I want to build relationships on equal terms, but I don’t understand if it is possible. Only two types of women come across to me – some try to remake me under their ideal, manipulate, blackmail and leave, meeting resistance. Others immediately agree to accept me completely, are ready to abandon their principles in order to earn my location. I don’t like this either.

Attempts to talk to nothing lead to anything – despotistical girls call an egoist, weak are losing respect for me, because they want to see me as a moody and imperious. Adequate partner who is ready to meet them does not attract them. Is it possible to agree with such girls – and if so, how? Or the problem is in me, since I meet only these two types?

An interesting question you ask, Sergey. I am not inclined to believe that problems in relationships are the fault of one person. Conflict, and here you write about it – this is always the result of the action of both parties.

But if you ask if the problem is not in you, having your contribution to the situation, your responsibility is what you are doing (or do not) that you are faced with the same conflict, then there is something to think about here.

I will immediately indicate that my further reasoning will have the appearance of a purely hypothetical. I will write based on my experience, and it may not be very similar to your. If you suit you-good, no-alas. Perhaps you can get a more accurate and detailed answer at a full -time reception from a psychologist.

So, what I pay attention to when I read your text? First: you write from a third person. Not what you are doing, but what is happening to you – “I come across”, “attempts do not lead to anything”. As if you are in this whole story – a passive and limp face. As if you are not making a choice. Try to rewrite the first -person story and see how it will affect you. I am sure you will notice the effect.

The second thing I can notice: you unite all girls and women by one rather abstract feature – a sign of dominance. I want to ask you: do you notice any other differences between them? And as to them, to these differences, treat? Why exactly the issue of dominance has become a key for you? And not, for example, how these women cook? Or what their voice is?

And if only one side yields, then this is not about “agree”, but about manipulating and violence

Probably, this topic for you has some kind of separate meaning and special emotional coloring. And then it would be nice to understand where it comes from and whether it has roots in your past.

And the third. You know, purely humanly I am very clear to me what you are writing about. There are people whom we do not suit in something important, in some of our essence. It happens. It is difficult for everyone to like in a row. And I will fully and completely support you in that you do not agree to this kind of victim, to betray. But, on the other hand, you seem to look for ways to change your partners for yourself. You also want them to change, asking if you can agree with them.

I don’t know how much it is possible. But, it seems, if not a single side is ready to give in, then it is hardly. And if only one side yields, then this is not about “agree”, but about manipulating and violence. Therefore, I do not really understand what exactly you want? Relations with these girls, but on your conditions? It seems not what can be called “on equal terms”.

I listed you three, as I see, key observations.

But they are made outside the dialogue with you, they have a large share of my personal speculations. In real work, of course, I would clarify much more facts. For example: and how big your sample was generally? Or: what does “relations on equal terms” mean to you? And why is it so important?

In this sense, if you still want to understand your question, our heading can only help you start. But she will definitely not replace full work with a specialist.

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